......1 YEAR !!!!.......

     To: Qwinn.....my loud one...my fierce one....my precious baby bird...

My...Oh...My Where has the time gone????

This picture wrecks me in every way. There is so much fear and sadness in your eyes. 

There was no way for me to make you understand that we were not going to leave you. That you would be ours, and that you belonged with us. It has been an ongoing journey of trust and resistance. I pray that as your heart continues to learn trust, I will be able to teach you through exhibiting trust in the One who brought us together.        

Little Thanksgiving Indian

     There have been many new experiences for all of us, over the past 12 months. We discovered that the miracles performed in Poppy's kitchen are cross cultural and could possibly bring about world peace.

       We went to the beach. I was a little nervous. I worried that you may not like the sand. {yes....I worried... momma+beach= happiest old lady ever} You loved it, and I just marveled at that little gift from Him.

         When you came home....all you wanted  were noodles. You weren't even picky about it. But there was something that wouldn't allow me to feed you ramen noodles 3x's a day....so a sweet friend showed me how to make some noodles that would ease the guilt...you were happy and started trying new things......we were happy and started eating noodles 3 nights a week, buying 20lb bags of jasmine rice and making monthly trips to the chinese supermarket.

the new ketchup, mayo, and mustard in my fridge...

.....I bought a wok....and an aluminum stackable steamer...

      .......and everybody asks what we are having for dinner....like this is some exotic asian buffet. But we love it. You have changed us all in so many ways. There are times when we think your scream will shatter our eardrums....and when your giggles melt us into little puddles into the floor..... I smile when I hear your little feet super fast running down the hall. Or when you smile and your eyes disappear and are replaced with those dimples. I especially love when you try real hard to smile with your eyes open....little zombie girl.

           I realize, at times, one year only represents half of the time spent with a loving nanny, whom I know you miss terribly.....and one year is only 1/4 of your days so far...and honestly on a momma's watch this is just a drop in the bucket. But in 12 months we have grown into a family of five. Our hearts have grown.......and we are overwhelmed by our love for you..

I love you baby bird.....with a fierce momma love. Happy Gotcha Day!